// JavaScript Document

   excuse0="My laptop battery melted and took out the hard drive.<br> ";
   excuse1="An intern we let go on Tuesday broke in last night and trashed my computer.";
   excuse2="We had a freak ice storm last night.<br> <br> ";
   excuse3="This new font format is causing us no end of problems.<br> ";
   excuse4="Unfortunately, we're getting a lot of errors with the new system.<br> ";
   excuse5="We had to repair a corrupt file.<br> <br> ";
   excuse6="I was stung by a bee this morning.<br> <br> ";
   excuse7="I was up all night with a vomiting dog.<br> ";
   excuse8="Right now, I have a very sick parent.<br> ";
   excuse9="We've got a pretty bad roof leak in the server room.<br> ";
   excuse10="I keep getting memory errors for some reason.<br> ";
   excuse11="We're having some internal issues right now.<br> ";
   excuse12="My left front wheel flew off this morning. I'm pretty shaky right now.";
   excuse13="Our TCP/IP addresses got trashed. Our network is down.";
   excuse14="The pharmacist wouldn't refill my meds. I've got a bitchin' migraine.";
   excuse15="I keep getting bad command line errors.<br> ";
   excuse16="I must have a bad font that's causing all these Postscript errors.";
   excuse17="Unfortunately, we're getting a lot of errors with the new system.<br> ";
   excuse18="I think I might have food poisoning.<br> <br> ";
   excuse19="It smells funny in here. I think we have a gas leak.<br> ";
   excuse20="One of the other designers here went kinda' psycho last night.<br> ";
   excuse21="Someone has been messin' with my cubicle.<br> ";
   excuse22="The power keeps going out because of the storm.<br> ";
   excuse23="I got run off the road this morning. I just can't focus.<br> ";
   excuse24="There has been some discussion about an extra spot color.<br> ";
   excuse25="Phil in accounting said he has some questions about your account.<br> ";
   excuse26="Some cross-platform issues have crept up again.<br> ";
   excuse27="Someone broke in to my basement and stole my sump pump.<br> ";
   excuse28="The police are here asking questions about a former employee.";

	 now=new Date()
  num=(now.getSeconds() )%28 
  num=num+1
   document.write("<p><b>Designer's Excuse# "+ num +"<br><br></b>");
  if (num == 0)
    {excuse=excuse0}
  if (num == 1)
    {excuse=excuse1}
  if (num == 2)
    {excuse=excuse2}
  if (num == 3)
     {excuse=excuse3}
  if (num == 4)
    {excuse=excuse4}
  if (num == 5)
    {excuse=excuse5}
  if (num == 6)
     {excuse=excuse6}
  if (num == 7)
    {excuse=excuse7}
  if (num == 8)
    {excuse=excuse8}
  if (num == 9)
     {excuse=excuse9}
  if (num == 10)
    {excuse=excuse10}
  if (num == 11)
    {excuse=excuse11}
  if (num == 12)
     {excuse=excuse12}
  if (num == 13)
     {excuse=excuse13}
  if (num == 14)
    {excuse=excuse14}
  if (num == 15)
    {excuse=excuse15}
  if (num == 16)
     {excuse=excuse16}
  if (num == 17)
    {excuse=excuse17}
  if (num == 18)
    {excuse=excuse18}
  if (num == 19)
     {excuse=excuse19}
  if (num == 20)
    {excuse=excuse20}
  if (num == 21)
    {excuse=excuse21}
  if (num == 22)
     {excuse=excuse22}
  if (num == 23)
    {excuse=excuse23}
  if (num == 24)
    {excuse=excuse24}
  if (num == 25)
     {excuse=excuse25}	 
  if (num == 26)
     {excuse=excuse26}
  if (num == 27)
     {excuse=excuse27}
  if (num == 28)
     {excuse=excuse28}		 
  document.write(excuse);
  document.write("</p>");